Monday, August 8, 2011


I'm reading "The Five Love Languages for Singles" and the chapter on "Gifts" has inspired me to write. In this chapter, the author mentions that if you listen closely people often talk about their interests and you can receive clues about what gifts best express love to them. After reading this I grew a bit upset because I mention flowers all too often to not have received any.

Months ago, I began purchasing flowers for my apartment weekly as part of my homework for the book "The Artist's Way". It was a loving gesture for my inner artist to tell her that I appreciate her and that she is doing great. Of course, when people see you buying yourself flowers you get some typical responses. The interested guy says "You don't have a man to buy you those flowers?"... As if his attempted pick up line wasn't obvious. The response that got a bit annoying went a bit like "What are you trying to prove or hide by buying yourself flowers?". I can only imagine that this person felt it was a reverse psychology type of thing to buy myself the flowers I wanted someone else to buy me??? Honestly when I executed this weekly ritual its sole purpose was for my inner artist.

It wasn't until I received flowers from my neighbor (thank you) after my first play instead of others closer to me that I realized something...I do want flowers from someone other than myself. I've never considered myself a girlie girl but what girl doesn't want flowers from her guy? I think there are certain universal gifts that we all can appreciate and apparently flowers is one of them for me.

The book explains that gifts of love don't have to be expensive or longlasting, just a genuine expression of love. A handwritten card, a dandelion from the field, a small giftcard to a favorite store. The memory of receiving the gift will outlast the life of the gift and sometimes the giver. This book is very eye opening to the people closest to me and how I give and receive love from them through the various languages. I won't say which of the five is my primary love language because I have much more to read. But I know I sure would like a tangible gift of love from time to time. Hee hee hee!

Gift No-Nos: 1. Purchasing a gift you assume they'd like instead of listening for the obvious clues or 2. Expecting something in return for the gift, hence making it a deal not a gift.

Peace yall!
- BJ Gianni

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